UPG – Over there stuff

If you can’t tell this post will be a woo heavy one.

So to start this out, Seren Lebannen had a brilliant idea on how to show what she looks like Over There.

Continue reading “UPG – Over there stuff”


So, if you haven’t noticed on the little side panel there, I follow a blogger by the name of Sebastian Lokason.

I watched this drama unfold. I make it a habit to stay out of drama, so I was originally going to keep my mouth shut. Then I was reading this post on another blog I follow, and thought “ya know what? fuck it. I got shit to say”. I will try to keep this as non rambly as possible.

I really can’t comment on what happened when those three were living together. I wasn’t there. What I can comment on is some of the other shit being said.

I don’t have a personal relationship with Seb. I read his blog, bought things from him, and got a past life reading done.

I enjoy his blog. Do I agree with everything? Absolutely not. Does that make either of us wrong? Absolutely not. Does he try to convince anyone that he is 100% right about everything? Absolutely not. Do I learn stuff from it? Absolutely. Do I get a crack out of some of his posts? Absolutely.

The whole thing about his UPG saying that his Big Self is Anar, “queen” of Vanaheim (I put queen in quotes because I remember him saying just about every time he mentions him he mentions that the queen thing is a rough translation and really doesn’t hold political power like we think of). Well I can’t comment much on that. I’m not that involved with Vanaheim outside of my work with Freya, Frey, and me poking about the Wolf Tribe a bit. But honestly, as I recall he doesn’t talk about Anar that much, and I never once got the feeling of “Worship Anar” or “Bow down before the mighty Anar!”. If it weren’t for Seb pointing out he had a perfume oil for Anar, I wouldn’t have noticed that he had anything for Anar.

I think that whole attack is to try to put Seb “in his place”. He had been getting a lot of attention in a good way, and we can’t have that. Some pagans get pissed when they see anything even resembling something that could possibly be a leader, especially if they are making some money in the process. Gods forbid some one make money off their talent!

Yea, he promotes his stuff on his blog. And? I like seeing the new shiny even though most of the stuff is something either not for me, or not something I can really be buying at that point in time. I never got the feeling of him trying to push his stuff on people. Who doesn’t like looking at pretty things?

And it is pretty fucking obvious that isn’t just about money for him. He lets people make payment plans. I know I’ve used that to be able to get some nice things before, and it helped a lot. Doesn’t sound like the actions of a greedy person to me. Yes he is making money off the stuff the services he offered and the things he makes (rightfully so), but he works with people so they can still get stuff. By the way, if you think his stuff is overpriced don’t fucking buy anything. Simple as that.

I do think the fact that he is trans has something to do with not wanting him to rise. Not just trans, but trans and gay. Not sure what happened to the whole “Pagans are so much more accepting” thing. And had sexual relationships with male spirits. How dare he! Hel, a big part of the “community” doesn’t want people talking about having any kind of personal relationships with our deities, especially not of a sexual nature.

Want to know what the biggest thing I learned from Sebastian Lokason was? Don’t be ashamed of your UPG, because it is yours and fuck what anyone else thinks.

One of the titles that frustrates me the most is “Special Snowflake”. Fuck that shit.

He isn’t saying he is the leader of Vanaheim, from what I understand he is just a big part of ritual that helps the land. Does that make him special? Kinda, to the residents in Vanaheim. Is it egotistical? Not really. Hel, this is the first time most of us are hearing about Anar being his Big Self, so it isn’t like he has been bragging about it. So yea, no.

I know some that their UPG says they are sacred queens (has nothing to do with being any kind of queen of Midgard so shut up), were deified by one of Them, Hel my own is that Freya is wanting me to become one of her Valkyries after this life. People see that as being egotistical, and wanting to be a “Special Snowflake”, except I haven’t seen a single one of these people ask for special treatment. Not once. I mean, people think it egotistical for a mere human to believe they are married to a God, or really have any kind of personal relationship with Them other than as a worshipper.

This shit needs to stop.

I keeping putting Community in quotations because we really don’t act like one. We constantly tear each other down and fight. That isn’t how a “community” acts. We are already getting attacked by just about all sides. We make progress, and then we tear it down ourselves.

Frankly, I really frustrated (if you couldn’t already tell) and sad. I enjoy Seb’s blog and because of those people, we won’t be able to anymore or at least for awhile. And that is really a loss for all of us.

I hope those people are happy with bring us another few steps back.

Fall is in the air

Here in Missouri, the temperature has very slowly started going down. In the morning and at night there is a definite chill in the air and the days aren’t smoldering. If you stand in the shade it actually feels amazing outside. That also has something to do with the miraculous lack of humidity.

Autumn is coming folks.

I’m also noticing the acorns that have been falling on my street are turning brown (as in brown before falling) which is a pretty good indicator here.

I am absolutely loving this weather.

Gods only know how long it will last though. Missouri. You can get all four seasons in one week so too hard to really tell. Not an exact science.

But the signs of the wheel turning are pretty clear.

Soon there will be pumpkin everything everywhere, so be prepared.

 And I get to wear my boots again! I have thigh high brown boots that are my favoritest thing ever.

Now unrelated stuff.

I’ve gotten new stuff, which I will be sharing pictures of tomorrow.

Frey has become a new player in my life and I’ll share more about that as well. Honestly, with my relationship with his sister it was only a matter of time.

I had purchased Sebation’s Visions of Vanaheim and I have been working my way through that. I will let you guys know about that as well as I will start talking about my budding work with the Wolf Tribe.

I’m thinking of posting some recipes too. Any thoughts on that would be appreciated. Keep in mind, I went to culinary school so I have all kinds of stuff.

Until tomorrow my loves.

New Moon, New Beginnings

Last night I did another reading with my faerie deck. This time I got the Priestess (finally they got past the Devil).


This card has really interesting timing on it.

I’m planning on doing my official Profession tonight. My dedication to the realms of Asgard, Vanaheim, and Mani (who I consider to be outside of those realms). I got special made candles from Nono (aka Sebastian), which are awesome. I actually ended up with two Mani candles though the purchase was for only three candles. The second one was smaller so I’m thinking it was left over stuff.

Now, my dedication is not something I’m saying anyone else should do, but it just felt right to me. And this card really showed me that it is right.

In the description it talked about the Priestess being near an oak, which is a tree that does tend to be associated with Thor. And for the new viewers at home, Thor is really the one that brought me on this path.

As a matter of fact, August 2nd was the anniversary of that meeting.

So, it’s about time that I do this and just feels right.

Past Lives

So freaking out a little bit.

I got a past life reading done by Nono. I was really excited at first. I woke up to a message at about 2 in the morning this morning, and suddenly I got nervous.

As I was reading through it, especially the first part, I felt like a was going to have a heart attack. I shall share with you guys.

“Hi! Here is the result of your past life reading.

Usually when I perform this service I see between 3-5 lives. These are not the only lives you’ve had, just what my brain will allow me to see in one sitting.

I use a combination of the Thoth Tarot and scrying to see into your lifetimes.

These lives are not necessarily in linear, chronological order.

I rarely get specifics of time and location but sometimes I do.


Knight of Wands
7 of Swords (Futility)
5 of Cups (Disappointment)
5 of Disks (Worry)
10 of Wands (Oppression)
Adjustment inverted
The Fool
6 of Wands (Victory)
Queen of Wands
Knight of Swords
The Moon inverted
3 of Cups (Abundance)
The Priestess
Princess of Cups
The Tower inverted
The Aeon

In this lifetime you were male (Knight of Swords). You were born during a time of war and chaos, and the early part of your life was characterized by hardship, struggle, privation and death, never feeling safe (Futility, Disappointment, Worry, Oppression). You had a harder time than most coming of age (Adjustment inverted). I am getting the visuals here of you being born during the tail end of the first civil war in Vanaheim. You were sorted Wolf tribe upon coming of age. This was an experience where you started off at the bottom and had to work your way up, by your merits, not earning rank just because of who your family was (The Fool). You did however gain rank and respect in the tribe and found a place there (Victory). You also found a mate (Queen of Wands); she was betrothed to another and you went against your caution and pursued her (Knight of Swords, The Moon inverted). Your relationship strengthened an alliance between your tribe and hers (Abundance) – she was Hare tribe, and an artisan (Art), she was also a priestess (The Priestess). You had a daughter (Princess of Cups). Your own life was taken during the continuing conflict in the realm (The Tower inverted) but your daughter was part of the great wave of change to cease the war and later, bring about a new era in Vanaheim (The Aeon).


Prince of Disks
Death inverted
2 of Disks (Change) inverted
10 of Wands (Oppression)
9 of Swords (Cruelty)
The Hermit inverted
7 of Disks (Failure)
6 of Disks (Success) inverted
Fortune inverted
The Hierophant

In this lifetime you were born male (Prince of Disks). You had some sort of serious illness as a child where you could have died, and did not (Death inverted), but it permanently disfigured you (Change inverted). As a result of this, you were seen as a “freak” in the community and scorned, mocked, bullied, sometimes even assaulted (Oppression, Cruelty). You went into involuntary exile when you came of age (The Hermit inverted), and lived a life of poverty and squalor (Failure, Success inverted, Fortune inverted). You decided, having no other options for survival, to become a monk (The Hierophant), and here you found your calling as an artisan (Art) – people could overlook your deformity when they saw the beautiful things you made. You were human in this incarnation.


Queen of Disks
The Empress
The Chariot
The Emperor
4 of Cups (Luxury)
5 of Wands (Strife)
Fortune inverted
3 of Swords (Sorrow)
4 of Disks (Power) inverted
The Star inverted
The Lovers
10 of Swords (Ruin)
9 of Swords (Cruelty)
2 of Cups (Love) inverted

In this lifetime you were born female (Queen of Disks) and into a very wealthy, powerful family, where you were expected to fulfill the obligations of an arranged marriage (The Empress); when you came of age, you moved far away from your home (The Chariot) to your new husband (The Emperor). At first things seemed good – you had a very luxurious, privileged life, wanting for nothing (Luxury), but your marriage was unhappy (Strife), and your husband had many political problems which caused you problems (Fortune inverted). You grew more and more depressed (Sorrow), you felt trapped and powerless (Power inverted). Before you could take your own life in despair (The Star inverted), you met a man and fell in love with him (The Lovers) – he was an advisor to your husband, a man of power and influence himself. When your affair was discovered, he was executed and you were imprisoned (Ruin, Cruelty) – he had also betrayed you to try to save himself (Love inverted). You died in this captive state (Death). You were human in this incarnation. You were also quite young when you died – not older than mid-thirties, probably significantly younger than that (twenties).


This is all I can see at this time.”

So yea, apparently a part of the Wolf Tribe in Vanaheim at one point in my life.

My strong association to wolves make a bit more sense now.

So much flailing!