The Rose – My Symbol

The Rose – My Symbol

As of late Freya has been sending me a lot of images of roses. I mean, a lot.

The rose is not something that I would have ever associated with myself before. I’ve really just never been a big fan of them. I guess just kind of feels cheesy to me, too mainstream (hipster all of a sudden). My favorite flower is the blue orchid. They are just absolutely beautiful, but I digress.

So I figured, well, look up stuff about it!

The most you find about roses is really what you would expect: love, love and more love. That is when you really have to dig a little deeper.

The rose was also symbolic carrier of secrets.

The term “sub rosa” means under the rose and comes from the practice of Romans hanging roses above meeting tables. Here it was understood that anything said at this table, beneath the hanging roses, was forbidden to be repeated elsewhere.

Interesting, considering I tend to keep a lot of personal stuff from a lot of people in my life.

In the Tarot, in which the rose is considered a symbol of balance. Here the beauty of the rose expresses promise, new beginnings, hope. This beauty is contrasted with its thorns which represents defense, physicality, loss, thoughtlessness.

In my search I ended up coming across a site about alchemy and ended up with this little fun tidbit:

“In the Bach Flower Remedies the wild rose (Rosa canina) is used to cure apathy. Wild rose is prescribed for people who have given up, who have stopped trying to solve an unwanted situation in their life, who believe that it does not matter or that their fate can not be changed.”

Well fuck.

See, as of late that is pretty well the attitude I had taken on. I just stopped caring. My job was screwing me over (favoritism bullshit) and there was all kinds of drama going on at home. The easiest thing to do so I didn’t go mad was stop caring.

It wasn’t until after the recent break up that that changed, and I have been so much happier since.

The part of the rose that it seems most forget about is the thorns, much like the warrior aspect to Freya. It really is a perfect symbol for My Lady.

As of late I have been getting much closer to Her. She has asked for a large rough rose quartz (which I ordered at the same time as the fulgurite). And once I do the clean out of my space, will start working on keeping fresh roses for Her, ones with the thorns in tact.

Hail Freya!

Until next time my loves and keep Her day sexy! 😛

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Do Not Weep

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.

-Mary Elizabeth Frye

The first time I hear this poem it was actually converted into a song that my younger brother’s choir was singing. It seriously gave me chills.

I do not fear death, it is an inevitability. Do I want to die right now? Of course not, I still have a lot to do but when my time comes, that’s it and I do not fear it.

I’ve already made plans for what I want done with my body after I die and I’ve made sure everyone I love knows this.

I’m sure those of you active on Facebook have seen these pictures or something like it:

Bios-Urn

That’s where I originally got the idea. I always knew I wanted to be cremated, no sense in adding another coffin to the earth, but this is genius.

I want to be turned into a weeping willow.

1-weeping-willow-sue-midlock

To me they are the most beautiful trees, and they have a bit of a nostalgia factor. As a kid I spent quite a bit of time with grandparents at their apartment and at one part of the apartment complex there was a great big weeping willow. I was always fascinated by it.

Digging only slightly into Celtic tree meanings the Willow has strong associations to water and the moon, both of which my sign Cancer also has strong associations with so that was an interesting tidbit I found.

Any way, back on topic.

I’ve also made it perfectly clear to my loved ones that I don’t want any sort of funeral. I’ve also threatened to haunt anyone that cries. I don’t want the fact that I died to be the only thing they think about. I’d rather a celebration of the life I had, a party not a funeral.

I tend to look at it pretty subjectively. I still don’t really know what will happen to me after this life is over. Thor may claim me, Freya may claim me, I might end up wit Hel (because let’s face the facts, the chances of me dying in battle are pretty slim), I just might end up reincarnating again. All I can do is tell my loved ones what I want done with this body after I’m done with it. That is, after any parts useful are taken (organ donor). I’d like as much good to come out of my passing as possible.

Until next time loves.

Fuckery that really needs attention

So Lucius Svartwulf Helson and Halstead have had their own war going on between the two. I’ve enjoyed the posts by Lucius but like I said before I usually try to stay out of the drama (as much as I actually like Lucius).

But in a comment on this post, Halstead has changed my decision to stay out of it.

In a comment he called Lucius’s Gods “sad little gods”. Keep in mind (if you didn’t figure out from this name) Lucius is a Heathen. I can tolerate attacking a person (to an extent) but start insulting my Gods, and it won’t go well for you.

Here is links to all the posts Lucius made:

If Your Paganism is Anthropocentric, I Don’t Want Your Paganism

Maybe I’m Not Here to Save Your World

Everyone Wants to Save The World Part 1

Everyone wants to save the World Part 2

Let’s Disenchant the World! Part 1

Let’s Disenchant the World! Part 2

Let’s Disenchant the World! Part 3

I Am A Special Snowflake….Apparently.

Everyone wants to save the world part 1

Everyone wants to save the world part 2

To Quote Nox: “I Warned You!” Part 1

To Quote Nox: “I Warned You!” Part 2

I am not by any means under any impression that I’m a “Big Name” but keep in mind this “Atheist Pagan”, I put it in quotes because it is on of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard, is insulting our Gods and I won’t stand by for it.

Please share this shit out of this. Share it and ask others to share. Spread it around as much as you can.

Normally I wouldn’t do something like this but he really brought it on himself.

To say I’m pissed is an understatement.

Progress of Relationships – Freya

So now that I am feeling much better (hardly any pain) I can get started on this series.

It’s Friday so who better to start with then the Golden Goddess Herself.

I call her my Lady, Sister, Mother, Lover, Mentor and Friend.

She is the Vandis, said to be leader of the Valkyries and receiver of Her choice of half of the honorable dead.

When I first started down the Northern Path I tried to start a relationship with Her and got no bites. I didn’t want to force it so I backed off.

Some time down the line She came to me. Sitting cross legged on my bed telling me to wear something with cleavage to church (at the time force by Christian parents to go to church at least once a month).

She hasn’t left me since.

We have gotten closer over time as most relationships tend to go.

She forces me to see the beauty in all things, especially myself. To look at it head on, embrace it and love it. Taking it wholly into myself.

She asks very little of me except to be a representation of Her in my own way.

She told me She didn’t come to me at first because She wanted to check me out first. Seeing that I had potential for her uses in this world She came to me.

She told me once She would like for me to be one of her Valkyries after this incarnation. Nothing is set in stone, but as far as I’m aware that hasn’t.

She pushes my views toward sexuality, forcing me to change it to something far more healthy. She love hanging around in the nude, which I have finally gotten used to.

She sometimes calls me Her child, sometimes Her sister, and sometimes a friend.

I feel all these things in the moments we share.

It’s a complicated sort of love but it is one that works for us well.

I bought perfume oil dedicated to her from Beth, and I wear it every day, always keeping her with me even when she isn’t actually around.

I burn her candle every day, and make special offerings on Fridays.

Some posts about her:

About the first time we met.

After a while.

As we became closer. At that time I thought having just three of Them in my life was difficult. Wow have times changed.

The Valkyrie conversation.

Just a bit of fun.

Some of the progress she has made with me.

More of the work.

A bit more about what she wants.

And that is all I have for today.

Until next time loves.

Happy Freya’s day!

Side note

So a little side note that I forgot to add to my last post.

I’m mentioning this because of the whole thing about my brother-in-law calling my younger brother (and myself by the way, but he was a lot more bothered by it than me) crazy for having the kind of relationship with Them that we do.

I explained to him talking to someone who hasn’t experienced this kind of stuff is really difficult (especially if its a tool like my brother-in-law) and most people will think you crazy.

My thought process is there is enough of us out there, and we can’t all be crazy.

So, as someone who has a very close relationship with Them, and sees at least one of Them on a daily basis, I encourage anyone who is in the same boat to contact me if they need someone to talk to.

*Disclaimer*

I am not a trained therapist.

I am not a medical physician/doctor.

I cannot and will not give advise on medication or anything medically related.

That said, I will listen if you want someone to just talk about it. In normal every day life matters, or religion type related things, if asked, I will offer advise if I have any to give.

Feel free to email me at wolfmoonchild09 at gmail dot com.  3

If I don’t reply right away, give me some time. I try to check my email everyday. If we have gone through a conversation and I stop answering it is most likely that I didn’t really have anything to say. I don’t like to say something meaningless just to say something.

Cleaning with Frigga

Yesterday I got to go home from work early because I work on Saturday. Usually I would just relax and enjoy the time off, and having the house to myself. It’s part of my weekend now after all since I have to work a half day on Saturday.

Nope, Frigga was having none of that. So I dusted my room (for the first time ever), vacuumed, cleaned my… umm….well I don’t really consider it an altar but it could be seen as one, and did a nice bit of laundry.

Having my room nice and clean, I decided I’d share some of the highlights of my room.

My non altar?
My non altar?

I have quite a few crystals, not all of them are set up here. If you want to know what ones are sitting there, I can list them off. The candle I had dedicated to Frigga (I engraved her name in runes into it) is currently lit. The pink one is my Freya candle, and the other one that is red but you can see very well is for Thor.

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My little snow flakes are for Skadi, but she is still MIA. That is a Pink Himalayan Salt Lamp
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You can see Thor’s candle a little better here. Also engraved his name in runes, but obviously you can’t see that.

 

It’s still a bit of a mess. It’s from all ash going everywhere from my incense. That particular incense holder is actually pretty old. Got it quite a while before the Norse path called to me, and at that time I had a bit of an obsession with Ankhs.

This is hanging up on my wall next to my bed
This is hanging up on my wall next to my bed

 

Hanging above my bed.
Hanging above my bed.
My necklaces, only about four of them I ever wear anymore.
My necklaces and two of my bracelets. Only about four of the necklaces get worn anymore.

Yes that is an Everstar necklace for the fellow geeks that recognize it. The greyish/black necklace is Hematite. The one on the far right is commonly known as the Samulet. If you watch Supernatural you should recognize it. The tan band is a bracelet called “Irish Blessing” It has a claddagh, Celtic cross, and a little green gem. And in case you can’t tell that little orange ball looking thing is a gold pumpkin with a gold leaf.

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My funko! pop collection.

Picture on the left, starting from the left is Charlie, Sam, Dean and Crowley. My supernatural collection. Almost finished, I just need Castiel. In the background you can see my toy laser gun (I’m an adult I swear!) and one box of my Magic cards.

The right picture is Merida and Batman (obviously). That little picture in the background is a panting from my best friend of Chibi Dean and a brown wolf that is mostly hidden.

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I also collect masquerade masks.

That blue thing is an Xbox 360 controller
That blue thing is an Xbox 360 controller

The man abs you see if a picture of Dean Winchester (aka Jensen Ackles) which was a present. The husky/wolf in the middle was a present from my mom, the small one I bought myself, and the larger one my older sister bought for me. The Iron Man mask was originally going to be a present for Fen. It looked like crap when I bought it, so I repainted it. Then Fen broke a promise (again) and I decided to keep it for myself. Iron Man is my favorite Marvel superhero. The head piece he is wearing is from my younger brother’s Madrigal. Madrigal is like a mini ren faire type performance that his choir does every year. I thought Iron Man needed to be pretty.

So there you have it folks. An unasked for peak into my life.

Happy Freya’s and Frigga’s Day

There is some debate on exactly who Friday is named after. Some say it’s Freya, some say it’s Frigga.

Before I was only close to Freya, so I would make a special point to celebrate her on Fridays (like I do for Thor on Thursdays). It’s not only that day that I do anything for her, I just do a little extra.

Now that Frigga has entered my life, and seems to be sticking around, I celebrate them both. You know, be all diplomatic. At first I was celebrating her on Wednesdays, but Odin didn’t seem to like that. Not like he hangs around all that much anyway.

I came across this post from one of the Heathen pages I follow on Facebook.

I believe it was a picture of an Icelandic Goði, and it said something along the lines of worship the gods in your own way. Something some people really need to learn.

I know for me personally, each God is different too.

I’ve been trying to get out of Frigga if she would like me to buy any kind of devotional pieces for her. I mean, I probably will anyway, but if she wants anything specific. Nope. Frigga is more interesting in being honored by me doing specific things for her. It’s about action and the environment you keep. At least with me, that’s the case.

Freya, is a lot of the same way, with the exception of that Valkyrie bust of course. But with her, it’s more in the way I hold myself and act in a day to day matter. She wants to be represented, and done so properly.

Thor does like me to buy things for him, but it’s more little things that he likes. I had agreed to wear red every Thursday to honor him. He also has some requirements on my actions. Specifically to protect any that I can, those deserving of it. I’ve gotten the impression that he tends to favor strength.

Everyone is different and I feel like if They ask for the same thing from everyone, not that much would really be accomplished.

That’s my opinion anyway.

Good times with the Golden Goddess

When I get bored I tend to look on Amazon. I just kind of search for whatever seems good.

Today I decided I would just put in “Freya” see what kind of stuff I could find.

As if I turned the Freya symbol light on, she popped and looked at the stuff with me.

It was a bunk of bras. Apparently there is a lingerie brand that is called “Freya”. Makes a lot of sense. Only problem is, I was doing this at work. Might be a little awkward if my boss walks by and sees a bunch of cleavage on my screen. I mean not as bad since I’m a lady but still, little awkward.

So I’m just going through these 20 plus screens of nothing but lingerie.

Me: No!

Me: Stop this!

Me: Why is it nothing but boobs and legs!

Freya: *giggling like a little girl*

And then this lovely thing showed up.

cheerleader Freya! Way to go Yu-Gi-Oh
cheerleader Freya! Way to go Yu-Gi-Oh

Her reaction was priceless! Oh, she was pissed!

Just to keep myself from busting up laughing in work for no obvious reason, I moved on.

It got me on a train of thought.

So I decided to look at Google to see how people imagine Brisingamen.

Google, is always so lovely to give me something that seems completely unrelated but actually is directly related, since I was just looking at images.

There was a picture of Scarlett Johansson, so I clicked to see why it showed up. Looked like it was bit of fiction, and Scarlett was being used to represent Freya.

I looked over at her to see her reaction.

Freya: Hmm *shrug* I’ll take it.

Side note : To me, it doesn’t seem like Scarlett has very much of a personality, but I don’t know her personally, so I have no way of being able to tell. But I would totally rock her world.

Freya: Oh really?

Me: Don’t start showing up looking like her!

Freya: I make no promises.

Me: Ugh!

 

Brain Craziness and a needy Goddess

I swear to the Gods, I have some sort of ADD.

Let me explain.

On a normal basis I go through these periods of time that I want to do one certain thing all the time. For a while, all I want to do is draw. And then all of a sudden, all I want to do is write (I like to write fictional stories but with my ADD I tend not to get all the way through a story). Suddenly, no more writing, I just want to read all the books! And then I don’t want to do anything but watch TV’s and movies.

Like I said, normal basis.

It is not so right now.

There are a few blogs I follow that sell stuff that they make on Etsy. I love seeing all the handmade stuff, and kind of inspired me. I would just buy their products but unfortunately the price is an issue. I can’t justify to myself spending that amount on a necklace. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand why they have the price they do. The materials they tend to use are on the higher side, plus all that labor and time that goes into it, but I just can’t talk myself into buying any jewelry for that much. I’m kind of frugal, AKA a major cheapo. I will come back to the Etsy stuff in a little bit. Anywho, it inspired me to try to make my own devotional beads (just for me, not selling).

So in my spare time I have been looking at the Michael’s craft store website to look at my beads, and then my ADD kicked in. “Look at that project! I wanna do it! Chalkboard wine bottle? Yaaass! Burlap pillow? Yaaaass!” To say the least, it wasn’t very productive. I did finally get around to looking at beads.

Now, while this is all going on, ideas for the story I started are kicking and screaming to be put into the story. I had started a fictional story that involves werewolves, the Gods, and tattoos and that’s all I’m going to tell you. I really can’t do more than one project at a time, or something will end up suffering. I’ll just keep bouncing back and forth, and will probably do just a half ass job, and that isn’t acceptable.

Part of my brain is “do crafty type shtuffs!” and then the other part is “get these damn ideas on paper and in the story!” *Sigh*

 

Now getting to my next point.

 

While this is all going on, Freya seems to be taking advantage of Skadi’s absence.

As I’ve said before, Thor has come back as normal. Freya is back, but not so much “as normal”. Skadi is still MIA, and from my understanding she is taking care of business. I don’t know details, again I don’t ask too many questions. Freya is kind of taking advantage of this to bring my attention more to her. She used to only pop in every once in a while, now she is around most of the time.

I found two awesome candles (well actually more than just two but I have to contain myself or I’ll have scented candles all over the damn place and be broke) that Mr. Nornoriel made. I haven’t gotten them yet, but I just ordered them, so obviously they wouldn’t be here yet. I’ll let you guys know how they are when I get them. I really do like trying to help support people that have their own business, instead of buying from huge chain stores, that is when my cheaponess doesn’t interfere. His candles are super reasonably priced. His blog is The Serpent’s Labyrinth. It’s on the list of blogs I follow. It’s worth a look.

Getting back on track (I told you, ADD).

Those two candles were for Freya, one specifically made for her, the other she was like “Oooo! Get that!” Before the only thing she had really asked me for was just incense and that Valkyrie bust. Now she is asking me for all kinds of stuff. A lot of it I have to tell it will have to wait until I have my financial stuff situated. This is usually when she starts to point. She is critiquing my attire, constantly reminding me “My future Valkyrie, I need you to be the best representation of me!” I want to be just comfortable sometimes damn it! Usually I get a “too fucking bad” and then a sweet smile.

Either Freya is simply taking advantage of Skadi’s absence to get more attention from me, or she is trying to make up for it. Hard to tell. Thor seems to find it all rather amusing. It’s irritating. My brain is just being pulled in all sorts of directions, but the first devotional beads I’m making are probably going to be for Freya.

 

 

 

 

Adventures in popping in Gods

Last night, as I predicted, Thor showed up again.

He waited until I went to bed and got comfortable. He decided to shove me over and cuddle. I couldn’t help but laugh at him.

 

Let me start a little bit earlier.

As I said yesterday, there was some radio silence for a while before Thor popped up again.

Last night while I was walking my dog, in pops Freya.

Freya: Hello!

Me: Oh hi!

Freya: I haven’t forgotten about you my little Valkyrie. Just have a lot of shit to take care of. *gives a side hug with a kiss on the top of my head*

Me: *in shock from the hug and kiss*

Skadi: *pops in behind Freya with a scowl* She’s a wolf, get it right.

Freya: Really?!

*both Freya and Skadi disappear*

Me: What the Hel?!

 

I have sort of made it a habit not to ask many questions. I think it may be best to stay out of the business of the Gods. If they want me to know what is going on, they will tell me. I have a feeling that me thinking about them kind of sent out a signal of sorts, letting them know that I was concerned.

Now getting back to Thor. I laughed at him.

Me: For the protector of Midgard and of Asgard and the strongest of the Gods, you sure are a softy.

Thor: Softy? Oh really? *jumps up and pins me to the bed with a big smirk on his face*

Me: *squeal*

 

And that’s where I’ll leave that.

Moral of the story?

Don’t call Thor a softy unless you want to get some interesting punishment.