More Feminist Stuff Part 3 – Celebrity Bodies

Another installment of feminist rant based on some crap I came across on Facebook.

I was scrolling through my news feed today and came across a post “Celebrities that put on weight” with a picture of Jessica Simpson when she was younger and skinnier next to a picture of her after she had her children.

This a phenomenon that seriously needs to fucking stop.

For some reason when people attain celebrity status we seem to think they become public property. It happens more with the women but men get some slack for gaining weight or losing muscle too.

Last time I checked, they were still human.

People will say, “Well they are the ones that put themselves in the public eye!” Umm, it’s their job. Technically you put yourself in the public eye as soon as you walk out of your house but you wouldn’t appreciate if people with cameras came running up to you saying “ [insert your name] did you put on a few pounds? Are you letting yourself go? Are you just pregnant?” No, you wouldn’t.

Yes they put themselves out there more than most people but it’s because what they want to do kind of puts them in that position, meaning being in movies automatically puts you in the public eye. Now this doesn’t include those famous for being famous like Ms. Kim Kardashian (do not get me started on her) more like the types like Angelina Jolie. There is also the case of musicians, to be successful they really do have to get famous, or they very well may struggle to support themselves on their passion alone.

This all said, in general, I feel like people have no right to comment on the body of other people (unless in a positive way because compliments are always nice) because that is their body and they can do what the fuck they want with it. This doesn’t change simply because they are famous.

For some reason when a female becomes famous her body becomes almost like public property for any Joe Shmoe to say whatever the hell he wants to about it. Now, when it comes to those nudes that get leaked? Well that is a different thing. The whole “its sexual assault to look at them thing” is crap. I’m sorry but the only offender is the person who spread those particular pictures. In the age of social media and really the internet, celebrities are not the only ones have their nudes leaked and spread without their permission. I’m not trying to say it’s not wrong, because that is not only a severe violation of privacy but it also takes away the right to pick and choose who gets to see your body, whether you are female, male, or anything between or outside of those.

In my opinion, celebrities have the right to their own private lives. Now if they choose to share their private lives with the media that is their deal (ie reality shows, or selling pictures of your child to magazines).

This whole attitude, though, really contributes to the fat-phobic culture that has developed here. It’s also caused by the borderline worship of celebrities in today’s culture. They are almost gods, and if they fall short of that divine view, well then they deserve to be ridiculed as their punishment.

I believe I’ve said this before, but seriously people. Mind your own business.

 Worry about your own damn body, not some stranger’s. Let’s face it no matter how much people like to think they “know” these celebrities, unless you have actually met them and spent time with them, you don’t actually know them. Sorry.

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Women, please stop!

Feminists tend to get a bad rep for being men haters, so I’m going to get on women a bit. This is going to include just some of my own personal pet peeves, but mostly going to be genuine issues that are really just hurting women as a whole in their fight to be seen as equals. Also some of the stuff women do to put men down, which hurts equality for women too though you may not realize it. Being equal does not mean put others down or taking away from others.

When a guy comes up to you and starts flirting with you, or maybe even hitting on you, unless he is actually being rude and/or obnoxious about it, your first reaction should not be to be a complete bitch and/or put him down. With some guys, it may have taken a lot of courage for him to approach you. All you have to do is say “I’m sorry, I’m not interested,” in a polite tone. Now, if he keeps pushing it, by all means do what you need to do to get him to leave you alone. You’ve already made it clear you’re not interested, obviously you will need to be a bit more rough to get the point through. Most of the time though, if you are polite, it won’t take any more than that.

Stop judging other women’s bodies or what they choose to put on said body. If she is comfortable enough to go out in what she is wearing, it is her decision to put what she wants on her own body. The media is probably already telling her that she needs to lose weight; she doesn’t need your help. Just mind your own business.

Stop compliment fishing. If someone wants to compliment you, they will. If they feel they have to it isn’t going to be genuine either. Asking if something is nice or looks nice is a different story. Asking if that dress makes you look fat or makes your butt look big is dumb. No one is going to tell you that it does so obviously you just want to be told you look good. Stop it.

This one is aimed at feminists. If a guy opens a door for you or pulls out your chair, the appropriate response is “thank you” not “I can do it myself” or any other form of being rude. He isn’t trying to make you seem weak, he is being polite. I hold doors open for other people all the time, men and women both. It isn’t because I don’t think they can open the door themselves, it’s just a nice thing to do.

If you are a feminist yet still jam out to rap, the most women objectifying genre, shut your mouth. If you are shaking your ass to “skeet, skeet, skeet” (if you don’t know what that word means, look it up) than you don’t then get to turn around and say men only look at women as sexual objects. Why? Because you are helping perpetrate that kind of mind set. Going out and having a good time by dancing at a club is obviously ok. Go and have a good time, but maybe listen to the lyrics every once in a while.

Stop calling yourself a “bad bitch”. Saying that makes me think you are a “stupid bitch”.  I’m sure I’m going to get a lot of slack for this one. If you are truly what a “bad bitch” is thought to be (I actually see it more from teenagers, so no your not) than you really wouldn’t in fact need to call yourself that, and most likely wouldn’t feel the need to either.

Stop blaming men for you being single. Just because you are a good person (and let’s be honest, you might not be if you feel the need to blame others for your problems) doesn’t mean you are going to be compatible with every guy. That just isn’t how it works. Obviously you just haven’t found one that is compatible with you, so stop blaming men for it. Also, side note, stop getting mad at all men just because one treated you like crap. It’s just dumb. Not every man is responsible for the stuff one pulled. They actually in fact are not all the same. I know. This is some kind of new way of thinking. Isn’t it amazing!

Stop kissing other women for male attention. As a bisexual woman (yup I’m bi) that shit is not only annoying, but it is confusing as hell.

Get over the “damsel in distress” syndrome. Fix your problems yourself. Yea, obviously there are going to be things you don’t know how to fix. That isn’t actually what I’m talking about. What I’m talking about is those women who are trying to find a man to get her away from her crappy family, or to help her with her financial issues, or to just protect her, or to help her support her kid (meaning just trying to find a father for her child). Men are not put on this earth to be our problem solvers. You will never be considered equal if you put them above you by wanting them to solve all your problems. If you feel like you need to be protected, take some self-defense classes, or learn how to use some kind of weapon. Again, take care of yourself. Maybe self-reliance is just a Heathen thing? *sigh*

Stop expecting men to buy you crap. Nine times out of ten, they have their own bills to pay. So he probably doesn’t have the extra money to buy you that super expensive necklace that you just must have. If you can’t get it, he probably can’t either. Oh, and stop just dropping hints or being difficult if he asks you what you want for a birthday or anniversary. Just tell the poor guy. While we are on that subject. If he constantly forgets your birthday or anniversary, just start reminding him. Honestly I forget that stuff all the time too. Some people just have bad memories. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t think it’s important.

Stop playing ditzy. That isn’t cute. Just makes you look stupid. If you got brains, show it off. If not, work on it. Knowledge is power ladies. If the guy likes stupid girls, he isn’t mature enough for you anyway.

Stop getting with a guy because you think you can change him. You can’t. He is the only one that can make that change.

Seriously, one of the things I don’t understand (and actually pisses me off) is the whole alimony thing. Child support I understand. Though with child support, they should investigate and make sure it is in fact going to the child. But alimony makes absolutely no sense to me, and frankly I think it should be stopped. If you don’t work (and/or never worked) but are getting a divorce from the person that supported you, sounds like it’s your problem. With that said, again, don’t get with someone just to help you with your financial situation. This is why I don’t understand women who don’t get a job because they want something like a sugar daddy. You are just screwing yourself over, because now if that doesn’t work out, you have no work experience to be able to support yourself. You screwed yourself over, so I don’t think he should have to pay for that. It isn’t right.

Stop with the slut shaming. What a woman does with her body is her business. A slut is typically what a woman is called if she sees sex the same way most men do. What she does with her body is her business and you have no right to even judge her.

This is the most important one.

Stop calling rape when you were either lied to by the guy or simply regret sleeping with him. Two major reasons why (in case you’re dense enough to not understand why it’s not ok). First and foremost you are ruining someone’s life. If they are found guilty, you are sending an innocent man to prison, where he will be punished by other inmates for raping a woman he actually didn’t. Even if he isn’t found guilty, he will be labeled as an accused rapist for the rest of his life. This could cause him to lose friends, maybe some family members, make getting a job harder (if it makes it to court it will be on his record) and getting a relationship harder. Secondly, it makes it that much harder for real rape victims to get justice. If enough women cry rape, they will think all women are doing so. That means they have to get incredibly insulting questions about their sex life and so on. Just fucking quit.

That is all I can think of for now.

Bring on the lynch mob!

Skinny girls vs. Big girls

For some reason, women have this competition thing engraved in their DNA. It seems most females feel the need to compete with other females, and usually for the attention of men. Even in my own family, my older sister that is closest to my age, R, feels the needed to compete with me and she is engaged. My reaction is just kind of, what the fuck? I don’t really feel the need. It’s not really that I’m so confident or anything like that. Mostly just because I really don’t care.

Here’s the thing. There seems to be this unspoken war between big girls and skinny girls.

The big girl battle cry: “Real women have curves!”

The skinny girl battle cry: “Skinny shaming!”

Un-fucking-believable.

Let me first explain the view point I am coming from. I’m a woman of fairly average height of 5’5. My pants size is 12 in women’s, only one size above the average of size 10 (despite what clothing stores seem to think). I’m actually more top heavy. The point is I’m not skinny, more of a chubby type chick.

Now that we got that out of the way, I’m not here to take sides. Most of the time I’m either too big, or not big enough to fit in either category anyway.

Let me explain the big girl battle cry. There has been a wave of big girl self-empowerment. This is truly a reply to all the shit skinny girls have been talking on big girls since the obsession with being skinny started in the 80’s. Big girls get told that they are slobs, lazy, ugly, not good enough for a “decent looking guy”, etc. They get bombarded daily by the media by weight loss advertisements. Depending on their size there is a good chance they won’t find clothes in their size, have to pay more for their size, or will only find ugly, granny like clothes in their size. Big women are VERY rarely shown as the heroine and almost never get to be the love interest. 9.9999 times out of 10 they are going to just be the funny friend. They have to lift themselves up, because no one else is going to do it for them.

Skinny girls, this is my message for you. Don’t take it so damn personally. Unless you are a board, you have curves, so get upset and yell “skinny shaming”? Yes your curves may be smaller, some may not. I have seen skinny girls with kicking curves. Don’t get upset when you see on Facebook “real men want a woman with meat on her bones”. Guess what? Unless you are literally a skeleton, you have meat on your bones! You crying “skinny shaming” isn’t helping you at all. Considering how much “fat shaming” goes on, no one feels sorry for you and frankly, no one cares.

How about instead of this stupid competition, we work to build each other up. Whether you are a size 2 or size 22, you are beautiful. Now shut the hell up. This competition crap is beyond stupid. You are the only person you need to worry about. Someone else’s body is not for you to criticize. You don’t know what someone could be going through. Maybe that big girl has a thyroid problem and no matter how little she eats the weight won’t come off. That super skinny girl? She could have cancer and can’t get herself to eat or hold food down no matter how hard she tries. Mind your damn business. How about that? All that criticizing and bringing other women down frankly makes you look catty.

When you can look at another person, and see beauty there instead of a waist size, skin color, etc. the world will be a beautiful place for you. I can promise you that. Not to mention, with all that’s going on here, I think that stranger’s dress size is so very inconsequential.

Just so I don’t leave anyone out. Now men don’t typically have to deal with this, though they get bombarded with images as well.

If you’re a big guy: You’re a sexy beast too.

 

The New Wonder Woman – Bust Size? Really?

 So as most know, in the second Superman movie aka Superman vs. Batman, Ben Affleck is not the only controversial casting choice.

This movie has jumped through so many different women for playing Wonder Woman it’s hard to keep up. Frankly, I’m just glad that it isn’t going to be Meghan Fox. Can’t stand her.

They finally settled on former model, Gal Gadot. She also played in a couple of the Fast and the Furious movies. Remember her? Most don’t.

Looks like she's got some fight in her
Quit criticizing her body, or she’ll shoot

Honestly from what I’ve seen, none too impressive. Though it is really hard to follow up a legend like Lynda Carter.

Gal doesn’t have a very impressive resume, and it takes great acting chops to be able to hold a franchise like Wonder Woman on your shoulders (because that’s the plan, starting building up to her own movies etc.). To say the least, I’m concerned. Wonder Woman is an Amazon, a symbol of female empowerment. She got to save the man, instead of the other way around.

Physically, Gal doesn’t exactly fit the Amazon image. Though, it isn’t unheard of for actors or (very rarely) actresses to bulk up for a role and she has the exotic look down. My biggest problem with the criticism on the casting (and it is 100% coming from the male fan base of DC, not saying all males though) is that apparently her boobs aren’t big enough.

Let me say this again. HER BOOBS AREN’T BIG ENOUGH.

Are you fucking kidding me? Just because for once a female superhero isn’t extreme enough in her proportions that you can’t get your nerd rocks off she isn’t good enough?

 If you look at the females in comic books they always have rib breakingly small waists, large breasts and shapely rear. Just unrealistic, if you want to be 100% real that is. Comic books are the biggest culprits in unrealistic expectations of the female form, but I still enjoy them. I mean, you can’t really ask comic books to be realistic when you have a guy flying around that can leap tall buildings in a single bound. But to try to hold real life people to those kinds of standards is absolutely ridiculous. But if you took the comic book Wonder Woman and put her in real life, and tried to make her a model, she would be a plus size model. Stew on that for a moment.

I will be giving Gal a chance. She is still fairly new to the silver screen so she may blow our minds when she hasn’t had a chance to before.

We shall see.