We are the future Ancestors

“I respect traditional people – they have the eyes which see value in the tarnished. This is a gift in itself. Tradition requires a wealth of discipline in order to be adhered to, hence it is rarely found in youth.”
Criss Jami

So when I get on here everyday, the first thing I do is look at the blogs I follow and catch up on their new posts. Sometimes I get some good inspiration. I went over the Stormwise Raven’s and something really popped out at me.

He was commenting on a post about the hate mail that is being sent over to the new Heathen temple in Reykjavik about their acceptance of same sex marriage. That is not something I’m going to comment on because frankly, I’ll just end up making myself angry. What I am going to get into is the little snippet “those who will come to call us ‘ancestors’ in the future“. Really got me thinking.

As Heathen we believe in honoring our ancestors, its really integral to the path. But I don’t know how many of us think about being ancestors that are worth honoring. I know I haven’t thought about it much.

Sure most of think about being good parents if you have kids or are having kids. Some probably about being good grandparents (mostly those that already have kids, especially ones older in age) but what about great grandkids that you might not ever see, or great great grandkids. What kind of legacy will you leave for them.

It is something a little hard to actually wrap your brain around, trying to predict the impression that you will leave on people you haven’t met and don’t know anyone that has met you. They would have to go based on stories that are passed down, or even lack there of. They may never end up having an opinion of you or hear of you. The child might find out about you because of a school project where they have to make a family tree.

You can try to take actions now. You can try to pass your beliefs on and make them family tradition (if it isn’t already). You can push the importance of family and remember your ancestors. You can try to do great things that will leave impressions in the family. There is simply no promise of being remembered.

I don’t have children of my own (yet). Not so much worried about being honored, but for those who will know me and remember me, I would like to be remembered as doing good for my family. I will concentrate more on making sure my mother is remembered, my father, my grandmother and grandfather. There is only so much you can do, but you can affect the generations that come about during your lifetime.

Advertisements

clothing type stuffs

So I was too happy about this. I had to share.

Just got this awesome shirt in the mail last night.

It says “Shieldmaiden Strong is the new skinny”

Have I ever mentioned I love Lagertha?

And I have this bad boy coming in the mail

Its a zip up jacket
Its a zip up jacket

Super excited to get it.

I just wanted to show off a bit.

Just a Thought

I am a customer service representative. I take calls and talk to many different people every day.

Quite often I have customers say “God bless you” or “have a blessed day”.

Doesn’t bug me, I just say thank you and end the call. They are simply being nice.

Quite a while back though, I had a customer borderline harass me.

He started out complimenting my voice (this is something I get often), and then moved to asking me “Do you know Jesus? Do you know Jesus your lord and savoir?” I tried to just ignore the question because frankly, pagan or not, it’s none of his business. This is my job, my place of work, and religion doesn’t belong there. He kept questioning me until I felt so uncomfortable, I lied and said yes just to get him off my damn phone. He proceeded to say “I can tell by your voice”. Unbelievable.

This is not the first time I have been harassed by a stranger. I always try to be polite, trying not to give pagans a bad name, but I can’t handle being preached to by complete strangers who harass me in that manner.

If the tables were turned, and a heathen kept asking a Christian “Do you know Odin, the Allfather?” or whatever, it would be an all out battle.

Like I’ve said before, I have no problems with Christians in general, but seriously. First off, you shouldn’t ask me that kind of question. Second, if I don’t answer the first time, it’s because I don’t want to. I’m not looking to start an argument.

I wear my Mjolnir in public, constantly, but I don’t talk about my religion to anyone that doesn’t ask.

Like the saying goes. Religion is like a penis. Its ok to have one, but don’t whip it out and shove it in everyone’s face.

Polyamory

So I’m finally getting around to post about my date. Even though I have two dates with them now.

I’m sure you can tell by the title where this is going to be going.

It was a date with a couple, female and male. They had approached me to become part of a polyamorous triad.

Honestly, at first I was a bit hesitant, but I figure “hey, why not give it a shot?” Not to mention a little push from a certain goddess of sex and war wanting me to expand my horizons.

I’m not going to get into too many details at the moment, but to say the least both dates went well.

This is not the first time I had been approached by a couple looking for a third. As a default I usually respectively decline. I do tend to have jealous tendencies, and that simply does not work for this kind of relationship, so I never really gave it a chance.

Not to mention that kind of relationship is more difficult. You have to be attracted to both of them (in the triad situation), and have to “click” with both of them. Not can be really hard to find.

Not to mention the big two things I am wanting in life. Marriage and at least one child of my own.

See, I don’t do flings. I just don’t. Waste of everyone’s time, and I’m just too old for that shit. They came up front and told me they are wanting a long term thing with their third person.

That creates an issue for at least one of those things, if not both. Especially when considering they are engaged and about to be married, and already have a child of their own.

I made it clear that those two big things were issues. Obviously I won’t be able to get married if I stay with them long term. That one though, isn’t as big of a deal as having my own child is. (In Polyamory, communication is even more important than in a regular monogamous relationship)

They told me, if it works out, they will have special ceremony (though obviously won’t be legally binding) to make me feel equal. Still not sure how that will work for me. Just kind of taking it a day at a time for the most part.

This is all new to me, so I think I’m going to start posting about Polyamory as my relationship goes along. Plus, I’m a nerd and I did research on it.

It really can be related to Heathenry, considering how many godspouses there are. Those relationships are truly polyamorous. I’ve found mostly that the human doesn’t take any human lovers (sometimes they do take on multiple Gods), and obviously the god has many spouses and lovers, so it’s pretty one sided but polyamorous none the less.

More to come.

Craziness

It has just been craziness here. Been too busy to post anything because of training. Now I am just about done training and I have to make a trip down to Texas.

My grandfather passed away on Saturday. He has been having a lot of medical issues the past couple months, so at lease he isn’t suffering anymore.

I didn’t know my father’s father very well. I really only have one memory of him. I was sitting on his lap and he was showing me these really old slides he had. I can’t tell you how old I was at the time but I can say I was very young. I thought those old style slides were just the coolest thing ever.

I’m leaving for Texas either tonight or tomorrow morning. It’s going to be interesting. I don’t even know most of my father’s side of the family so it’s going to be a lot of meeting my relatives for the first time.

But my Grandpa made it to the ripe old age of 90. Apparently on my father’s side they live long lives (by the way this is the side where I get my Nordic heritage so it’s not all that surprising, we be tough lol). My great grandfather actually made it to 100. Gives me hope for my life.

As far as other updates in my life, it has been interesting.

I’ve actually been talking to a couple and might possibly be getting in a polyamorous relationship.

One of the biggest issues with this came up between me and the female, and that is the fact that it is really important for me to be able to have a child of my own. They already have a son and I can guarantee that I would love the child as my own but it still isn’t the same. They weren’t comfortable with it. My stance is that it’s a necessity for me, and if they want something lasting with me that is the way it will have to be. If they can’t cope with that I’m ok with just a short term deal (and frankly that is kind of how I was going into it). I don’t know. I have a lot of mixed feelings. I probably won’t want it to be long term. They are engaged to be married so basically I’m kind of always going to be an outsider.

At the moment I am just talking to them and see how things go.

20150131_152106

But I can finally show you guys my tattoo. This is a picture of when it was fresh. My first tattoo didn’t bleed like this one did but my arms are kind of veiny so it isn’t all the surprising.

Afterword Skadi just kind of smiled at me and said she was proud.

It was pretty funny though, my tattoo artist was probably about twice my age and was flirting with me the whole time. But hey, I got my tattoo for cheap and the next one I get if I go to him will be cheap too.

My next tattoo is going to be of Yggdrasil on my other forearm. Probably get it when I get my tax return.

I should have some time today to post a bit more, and frankly I feel a rant coming on. More to come hopefully.

 

I’m Not Dead

Sorry I haven’t posted anything in a while. It’s been kind of crazy. At work they have me as a trainer for the new people now and they had two new people come in one right after the other so I haven’t had any time. The second one is getting closer to being done but it looks like right after that, we are going to have another one for me to train.

Tomorrow I’m finally getting my tattoo for Skadi. I’m kind of nervous even though I already have a tattoo. I will post a picture of it as soon as I get a chance. It looks like I’m going to have the time to post some stuff today because my trainee is going to be sitting with someone today.

I’ve got a post that has been swimming in my head for about a week now, and I’m really hoping I will be able to get it up today. We shall see.

I’m happy for the opportunity to do this training but it has been a little nutso.

More to come when I get the chance.

 

Come and knock on our door, we’ve been waiting for you

Where the kisses are her’s, and her’s, and his……..and her’s.

Ok so no, Skadi and Freya aren’t doing any kissing.

Sharing an experience between three Gods, well one God and two Goddesses, is interesting to say the least. Especially when Skadi and Freya bicker and Thor is just standing back and listening. I just try to not get in the middle of it.

Skadi had been getting on to me about not exercising. I had been incredibly tired, no energy what so ever. I kept telling myself I needed to work out but my body said “nope. Get your butt on the couch”.

The argument wasn’t about her getting on to me; it was about why I should be exercising.  Insert palm to face with a slow head shake.

Skadi was insisting it was to make me stronger, which Freya sort of agreed, but that it was only part of the reason. She was more concerned about me getting my confidence up. With higher confidence I will be able to push for what I want more. Skadi just kept insisting it was physical endurance that I needed, so Freya got a bit more….well sassy.

Freya: She’ll be more sexy. She can be a pin up Shieldmaiden!

Skadi: *glares* (if looks could kill)

Freya: *wiggles her butt at Skadi*

Skadi: *Starts growling*

Me: *Trying to find a place to hide*

Thor: *Bent over laughing*

Not helpful!

Freya did end up pulling me to the side and having a more serious conversation. I’ll be making a completely separate post about that.

Sometimes not all three of them are there. Skadi actually very rarely shows up. It’s more when I’m not sticking to my exercise schedule that she wants, or sometimes when I’m exercising and throwing in the towel too early in her opinion. Usually she isn’t exactly being the nicest, but I know it’s for my own good. Like I said before, Skadi does not baby you. She wants to kick your ass into gear.

Hopefully before the end of the month I will be able to get that tattoo for her. I can tell she is a little excited for it, but she doesn’t like to show it. Between the three of them, the dynamic is very different. It seems most of the time Skadi simply tolerates Freya, unless they are agreeing on something. Thor typically sits back and just watches like it’s some kind of reality show. He more concentrates on spending time with me. He’s been getting a bit more cuddly lately. I don’t know what’s up.

The mystery entity is still creeping about, but I’ve given up on trying to figure out who or what he is. Nobody else seems to be paying him any mind, so obviously not someone/something I need to worry about.

Freya is usually the one that I rant to with my feminist issues. She usually agrees with a lot of it, except the objectification of women. She has no problem using sex to get what she wants. I still love her but *sigh* we have to agree to disagree. A lot of it though is me bitching about the crap some women do that really is just some of the most idiotic crap that I’ve ever seen, or a lot of the times read.

They are all helpful, and I am really thankful for them.

Freya – Sex Bob-Omb Shieldmaiden

When I first started this blog, I didn’t think I’d end up doing this post. When I first starting attempting to possibly get in contact with the Gods, she was the first one I had in mind. Thor had other plans on that, but I digress.

I had started by buying Strawberry and Rose Sandalwood incense, mostly just going off instinct. Dedicated them to her, and a whole lot of nothing.

After a while I gave up, thinking she was simply not interested in working with me. I didn’t take it personally. I thought maybe because I’m just not the most feminine/girly woman out there. At the time, I didn’t care that much about my appearance. Only enough that I didn’t look like a slob.

I talked before about the first time she appeared to me. Was a couple of weeks ago when I was getting ready for my once a month church visit. She just appeared, sitting with her legs crossed on my bed, telling me to wear something with cleavage.

That was the beginning and she has been around ever since.

She explained to me she didn’t make contact before because she simply wasn’t sure if she wanted to work with me or not and it wasn’t because I’m not that girly. She just wasn’t sure because I was sort of new to all them.

She and Skadi have kind of been working together on my confidence but in quite different ways. Thor and Freya sometimes act like siblings too, since they are the two that are around the most. It’s really funny sometimes. She is more like the older sister.

She really liked the Rose Sandalwood I had originally gotten her and the Strawberry but not as much. Of course they stopped selling the Rose Sandalwood at the place I get my incense but she is pretty content with the plain Rose.

She comes to me as a buxom blonde, but still quite approachable. During my mourning session after J, she let me lean on her a bit. She has become almost like an older sister to me.

She is the one that is nice to look at, but will kick your ass if you look at her wrong.

Sometimes when I’m walking she will swat me on the stomach and tell me to stand up straighter. The other day she gave me a Gibbs style smack on the head and told me to “spoil yourself for once damn it!”

She sort of talked me into hanging out with Batty on New Year’s Eve (more like shoved me out of the house) when I was becoming reluctant because he wanted to go to a party.

She threatens me when I don’t want to try on certain dresses or clothes at the store because I think they won’t look good on me. Scariest blonde I’ve ever known.

She has told me before that I am beautiful *blush* but she wants to bring it out. She said when she’s done with me I’ll be a sexbomb warrior. I laughed quite a bit at that and she gave me another Gibbs smack.

She also really likes watching Supernatural with me. I think she likes Dean as much as I do.

Hail Freya! The beautiful blonde that will drop your ass in a second.

 

Skadi and the Wolf

Finally making a post about Skadi.

Before I didn’t really feel comfortable with it because she was so fuzzy in coming through to me. Since the trauma (I know that seems a bit dramatic but you didn’t see how it affected me) that happened because of J, she has been coming through clear as a bell.

A lot of this may be me repeating myself from other posts.

She has become almost more of a trainer/teacher to me. She has been pushing me to work out. So far she has only asked two things of me, her own incense and a tattoo.

The incense is a pine/peppermint scent. It is really quite nice and is called some kind of fancy winter related name that I can’t recall. I was at 5 Below, a store where everything is five dollars or less, and came across it. I sniffed it and she jumped. She usually requests when she wants me to burn it since I have so many other ones I like too. At first, that was all I could get through from her.

 The tattoo will be a small bow and arrow on my left forearm. I’m actually planning on stopping at a local tattoo shop today to get a quote and maybe make an appointment. I’m super excited.

Since she has become more active with me it has been interesting. Whenever I feel low she gives me a swift kick in the ass, telling me it’s not allowed. Skadi isn’t one to be easy on you and baby you, but I actually really like that about her. She is a very strong woman (in her attitude, otherwise completely obvious being a Jotun/Goddess after all) and wants to make me more so than I already am. You really just can’t be sensitive with her.

I enjoy what time I spend with her and she always pushes me past the point that I would push myself, and that is so helpful.

She is also trying to get me more into natural remedies. Herbs and such. I’ve bought  a couple books already and working my way through them. Can’t wait until spring so I can finally start my herb garden that I have been planning for over a year. Unfortunately last year I didn’t have the money for it.

She seems to really enjoy all the wolf stuff I’ve been getting lately. I’ve been getting for myself, but she likes them too.

Hail Skadi, the strong woman of winter.

More Feminist Stuff Part 2 – Housewife

Second installment of “talking about stuff my more-feminist-than-me friend has brought to my attention via posting stuff on Facebook”.

This one is actually about something she posted today.

It was an article about Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting (? apparently she got married? I don’t know, I don’t keep up on celebrity personal lives) stating that she isn’t a feminist. Her reasoning behind that is because she likes to serve her husband. Along with her acting job she likes to cook dinner for her husband five times a week. The article was pointing out that apparently Kaley doesn’t understand what a feminist really is.

There are some feminists that seem to think women shouldn’t stay home and take care of their families, or work and take care of their families.

I personally I think that is a bunch of bullshit and really doesn’t go with what feminism is really about. It’s about the ability to choose whether or not you want to work full time, or be a housewife, or both (in some cases neither but I’m not particularly fond of those women who don’t want to do anything, in this case). It’s about the choice. Back in the day, women didn’t have that. They had to be a housewife because they weren’t allowed to work. And for those who didn’t get married were a burden on their family.

If you want to spend all of your time taking care of the house and children, and you and your significant other can afford that, absolutely go for it! Doesn’t make you any less important or that you don’t contribute enough. Considering how much cleaning I have to do, and that’s not even with children involved but a couple adults, it really can be a full time job. My ancestors actually considered the “housewife” (not something there would be a term for) to have authority because she kept the home, she held the keys and therefore power.

Some don’t even have that choice because of their financial state. That’s ok too! Doesn’t make you any less of a mother or wife if you need to work, and if anyone says any different they are a moron, you have the right to work even if it’s just because you want to.

This all goes the same way when the tables are turned, meaning househusband. Yes, those do exist, though they seem to be pretty rare.

Personally, even if for whatever reason I end up with a rich or just well off man, I would still want to work. It’s for the simple fact that I wouldn’t be able to handle being home all the time. I would lose my mind. I would want to get out and also earn money. I have this paranoia thing. I don’t want to ever give any one a reason ever to be able to hold anything over my head ever. I don’t want anyone to be able to say you would have this or be where you are if it wasn’t for me.